How are the boys doing?
Good news: they have normal sibling rivalry
Bad news: they have normal sibling rivalry
Both Jonah and Hudson are finding their new role with Annabelle and it's becoming a lot easier. Hudson was not so sure about her getting all the attention. He kept saying "Mommy she is famous and I'm not" I kept telling him that YES you are famous and are adored by everyone. I mean, who wouldn't love Hud? Jonah has learned what it's like to be a protective big brother (Hudson doesn't need the protection ha!). He doesn't have the jealous tendencies that Hudson has but the only time he may get uneasy is when he wants alone time.
First, let me explain that we are still in the "transition" phase. We do not know how long it will last but in the mean time we have to adjust and need help from our family/friends during this time.
How do you handle a child that emotionally is a 2 month old but has the behavior of a 3 year old? People will tell me to trust my instincts. My instincts tell me my reactions to her behavior is not "natural" and to trust my TRAINING instead. There is nothing "natural" about bringing a child from a foreign country into a home where her family looks different, sounds different and probably smells different. (like roses I'm sure). There is nothing "natural" about a child being separated from his/her birth parents and being raised by someone else. There is pain in the journey with us picking up the pieces while raising her as our daughter is an absolute honor.
First and above anything we are building TRUST. An infant trusts his/her parents because they are helpless and they learn from the very beginning that mom/dad is there to care for his/her every need. Annabelle is learning that with trust building exercises. Repetition in her routine...constant love....skin on skin contact...playing peek a boo. We take huge strides forward and sometimes she will have a trigger and turn to herself for comfort. She is doing very very well learning that we are her comfort and are here to protect her.
Here is what I can report:
#1 her favorite word is MOMMY
at the beginning she absolutely refused to address me at all...in fact, in China one translator said she kept calling me "big sister" (yes I cried after I heard that, but understood) I had a very hard time at the beginning with her not knowing who I am. Here's what I learned: her love language is MUSIC (yes!!!!!!!) We sang songs with our names to learn. BINGO! She not only addresses me as "mommy" but sings my name all throughout the day. I remember hearing my self proclaimed "adoptive" sister Rebecca's daughter Alayah say "momma" ALL day long when they first brought her to Texas. I remember hearing her heart just want to repeat it over and over as if she were having to pinch herself that THIS beautiful lady was HER momma. Annabelle is starting to do that with me and it tickles me pink that even when she is with my mom or Jeremy she still sings my name as if she is telling herself "I HAVE A MOMMY!" Praise God
#2 She is now a huge fan of Satchey (our Quasimodo 15 year old dog) Poor Satchey has been kept in our front formal living/dining room because Annabelle was terrified. Now, Annabelle will pull her collar, pat her on the back and chase her with such joy. I think Satchey is ready to go back to the formal/living with baby gates!
#3 MOST importantly....our baby girl's tender heart is healing. We named her Annabelle because it means "joy" after Mawmaw. She is a bottle of JOY! I can honestly say from the pictures I post on facebook....maybe 1/20th of them is NOT blury! It takes several tries to get a still photo because she is jumping, smiling and so excited.
